BigGirlz,
Are you
running on Unlikely Fumes? Yes I said Unlikely Fumes.
Ya see at
one time or another we've all generated an unlikely thought. What do I mean,
well of course I'll explain.
As defined, unlikely means something is
doubtful, improbable or questionable. For instance, you could have goals but
create a thought process that says it is doubtful I will reach my desired weight;
it’s improbable I will ever find a suitable mate or even questionable I will
come close to achieving a life of fulfillment.
Unlikely
Fumes...
BigGirlz,
we have to learn to move beyond the unlikely and channel our inner foundation
of absolute success.
Ya see
BigGirlz, as most of you know I write about and discuss subjects that are close
to me. Trust me, I'm well versed at meandering thru Unlikely Fumes. Weight, mate
and life are just a couple of subject permeating my life’s atmosphere.
Fume #1:
Let's start with weight. SHIT!!!!!
First and
foremost you have to be happy with you. If there is an issue, you have to take
the steps to change, modify, fix, correct (yes I can go on) it. In my mind when
your size prevents you from enjoying various aspects of your life a decision
has to be made. Change you or change what you like to do. So once again talking about
myself, I decided to endure the challenge of losing some pounds.
Again, not to fit into societal norms but to:
1.
Stop my
damn knees from hurting
2.
Climb a
couple flights of stairs without feeling as if my damn lungs were going to
jump out of my chest and say "heffa you're on your own, we're tired"
LOL
3.
Fit in
a roller coaster seat and/or sit comfortably in an airplane seat (no
extender belt)
See, when
you have what seems to be a larger than life ass, (giggle giggle) those simple
little things can be a freaking challenge. So what was so Unlikely about
that...well, I knew I could lose a few pounds but was unsure of the
longevity of keeping it off. Bottom line BigGirlz I had to take control of not
just my eating but my thoughts. You’re not just what you eat but you
become your most consistent thoughts. I had to KNOW that I could
make that change and believe that not if but when I fall
off the wagon, I could climb right back on and keep pushing
toward my goal. Am I there yet, close, but I have resolved in my mind that
I WILL. No room for doubt.
Fume #2:
The Mate (Oh Lord)
BigGirlz,
I started this blog because of the countless discussions I was either pulled or
jumped into regarding dating as a plus size woman (I don't really care for that
particular term, but whatever). Note the blog name, Dating not Marriage,
why? Because in my mind dating was as far as I could imagine for
my life, especially at this stage of the game. Marriage was a big ass
Unlikely Fume. Hell, I didn't take dating serious. I wasn't looking for
a mate. For what? What I realized while I was working to reduce the
amount of junk in both my trunk and mind, (super focused on me) there
was a different plan being constructed on my behalf. How? Well, as I
purged my mind of the 'improbable’ in many aspect of my life, things began to
change. I’ll forgo the clichés, sort of… As I changed so did my habits, thoughts
and aura (Y’all know I’m all about aura). Positive flocks to positive. You
see BigGirlz I can actually see me becoming a wife. Hell, who knew right? lol
Fume #3:
Life Fulfillment
Damn,
isn't that what living not existing is all about? Apparently I missed
the mark in my jacked up thinking patterns. Fulfillment comes from within, at
least for me. As always I’m referring to me in these scenarios. Point, only
you can determine your level of satisfaction. Maybe cars and cash or
friends and family hold the wealth of your fulfillment. In either case a life
of fulfillment should not be based on what others have planned for you. Ya see
BigGirlz I had it ALL wrong. I thought it would happen at each milestone
reached. You know, College Graduation, increased salary (trust me it ain’t like
that…lol) or even traveling the world, ok a few places in the world.
Nah…think about it after each accomplishment most of us are looking for the
next thing to do. I’m not saying those things won’t enhance your life or even
bring you joy. What I am saying is after all is said and done, when you are
alone and left to your own devices are you happy? Can you sit back and think if
I drew my last breath right this very second would I have regrets? Hmmmm….
Have I made some F’d up decisions, ABSOLUTELY! Can I go back and fix/change
them, hell naw. Do I let those things hinder me from moving forward, NOPE! BigGirlz, I seriously
thought that fulfillment would come from things outside of me. WRONG!! For me,
fulfillment truly is a “place of my self-content”. Once again, who knew?
I do, now!
